Thursday, May 5, 2011

Update on my Insanity

So, last week I weighed in before I left for my 3 days in Memphis...and I lost 1 pound, making me down exactly 20 pounds...half way to my goal.  I honestly, even though I talk a good game, am highly disappointed in myself.  I have so much more than this in me and I failed, with lots and lots of excuses. 

So, in Memphis, I definitely didn't feel very good about myself, but I was with my best friend and she always makes me feel good about myself, cause she's amazing.  Well, down at the concert is pretty much all "carnival" food and up on Beale is mostly "bar food".  All of which I love by the way.  So we ate..good!  I had two of the most amazing burgers ever while there!  Anyway, but we walked like 10 miles a day and I'm pretty sure I'm not exaggerating.  I still came back feeling highly bloated.  And, in my head thinking, I'm totally gonna kick bootie this week (working out, eating good) to make sure my weight doesn't go up on my birthday.  Well, I'm not weighing in on my birthday (tomorrow).  I mean the worst feeling to start my 31st birthday would be to gain like 18239128329 pounds (it could happen).

So, where do I go from here?  I ROYALLY failed my goal!  I mean, who's sick of hearing about it???  Who thinks I'm a total fraud?  I do, so it's okay if you do.    I will not have another countdown calendar, that pretty much did nothing for me.  But I sort of feel like I need another goal.  I guess a smaller goal (that's pretty lame...).  A friend at church (who is gorgeous and has 3 kids) said she works out 2 hours a day (she will slow down now that she's been on vacation) and every day that she works out she gives herself a gold star or smiley face sticker on her calendar...that sounds fun!  This I may try!  Maybe a goal to work out 5 out of 7 days a week for 4 weeks, that sounds feasible. 

As for the food...ugh!  I really do love food...I need to think about this.  Any suggestions?  I seriously feel like I need to detox my body, there is SOOO much crap in my body!  This I need to research, think and pray about. 

That's it...I'm sort of feeling dumb that I shared this and well, really didn't get anywhere.  Don't worry I'm not like depressed or anything, just feeling sort of silly...

1 comment:

  1. 20 pounds is not a failure it is awesome! (It took me six months to lose 13 lbs) It also has been proven that by just maintaining and not gaining weight that you really improve your long term health. My suggestion would be a heart rate monitor and a book on heart rate workouts. I wouldn't be surprised if you worked out too hard. Those of us with body image issues tend to punish ourselves by pushing our workouts.

    Your blog has been insightful to everyone who has ever struggled with weight and food. Society has pretty much screwed us all over when it comes to this sort of thing and we all have messed up thoughts in our heads. So try to focus on the awesome part! Do you have more energy? Do you feel better?