Monday, January 17, 2011

Haven't hid my stride yet...

You know how I said I had quit biting my nails?  Well today and yesterday I've caught myself doing it again.  My nails are not stubs, but I can't believe I was so absentminded the last 2 days I didn't even realize I was doing it.

And you also know how when you start feeling good about some things like I had started to feel a little better about my body, even though I've only dropped 6 pounds I just wasn't as jiggly.  Well, so I start feeling better about that and then I get a zit.  Is that like Murphy's Law or something?  And not like a "I can hide you with make up or you're under my eyebrow (why do those hurt so bad?), it's so insanely noticeable.  Oh that darn Murphy!!

Today I watched my son go get a blanket from his room and bring it into the living room to cover up his daddy sleeping in the recliner!  What a sweet little Spirit!  And it reminded me of something when I was a kid.  I have a terrible memory from my childhood, years of brain cell abuse will do that for ya!  Even though I truly believe God will restore my memory to it's fullest.  Anyway, when I was younger, let's say 8 I had to go to bed at 8 or something like that.  Well, my sister is 18 months older than me and got to go to bed 30 minutes after me and we shared a room (until I was 13 or 14).  I remember one night being awaken from sleep with my sister putting a blanket over me, I must have kicked it off.  I often slept either on my stomach with my booty in the air or I'd have to lay on my back with a bunch of pillows propping it up (I had asthma as a kid), but this time I was on my stomach.  I remember it being probably the sweetest thing my sister had done for me, well, at 8 I thought it was the sweetest thing.  From that night forward for a long time I would purposely not cover up and without regard my sister would always cover me up.  To this day my sister covers me, not with blankets, but with comfort!

I realize I've gotten a little off track with the original idea of this blog.  It doesn't mean I'm not fully invested in the weight loss and just being honest about it, but I have so much I want to write and am so glad to finally be doing it, I figured going slightly off course never hurt anyone (okay, it probably hurt some people but this is just a blog..geez).

I did the treadmill for 30 minutes this morning and did intervals.  Longer jogging intervals this time, so I'm happy with that.  And I promise you my body did NOT want to do it, I mean, didn't at all.  I kept picturing Jillian from "The Biggest Loser" screaming at me that if I stopped jogging she'd make me go longer.  Then when I was jogging, I'd picture Bob telling me how great I was doing.  It's really silly, I know, but whatever gets me going.  At this point if I have to picture a gigantic alligator trying to bite my booty to get me to jog I'd do it!  I  I mean, as this week progresses toward the weekend it's getting harder.  I'm not some crazy grieving, I can't handle it person.  I feel like I've done pretty amazing given all the circumstances, but her death is a part of my life and if I can push through this week without binging and without giving up hope on my weight loss you can push through whatever seems to be holding you back. 

I also watched a friend's kids for a few hours this afternoon, which was so fun for my little guy and baby girl seemed to have fun too.  But I even managed to squeeze in a 30 minute Gilad work out while they were playing!  Yay for me.  The sweating on the treadmill this morning felt really good, and I seemed to be in a little bit better of a mood today! 

Dr. Oz had a program on "Food Addiction" today, I'm planning on watching it a little later and probably make some comments on it!  I started the program and took some notes.  Today's entry is long enough, so I'll save it for tomorrow, or another day I don't have enough to talk about.  Just a quick preview, of the 5 warning signs of "Food Addiction" I had at least 4 of them and 5 if I really dug!  Ouch.

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